Sanity Is Overrated

This column originally appeared in the July 24 edition of The Journal-News.

On Wednesday morning, I made my routine stop at the Litchfield Police Department to pick up the accidents from the last week. After exchanging pleasantries with the friendly faces in the dispatch room, Police Chief Lee Jarman said that he had heard a bad rumor about me.

"I heard that you did the Big Dawg Dare?" he said. "Are you crazy?"

Proudly, I can say that I am. Two years after covering the inaugural 5K obstacle course run in Litchfield, I finally took the plunge myself and participated in the race this past Saturday, July 19. Notice that I was careful to choose my words in the previous sentence, using "participate" instead of "run."

As a physical specimen that is more fleet of truck than fleet of foot, I ended up walking most of the race and came in 289th out of 290 with a time of 1:12:50.41. While my time was a little slower than I originally hoped, I'm happy with the fact that I merely finished the 3.1 mile torture test after promising to run it last year, then reneging when we accidentally scheduled our vacation for that weekend.

Granted I probably could have run more of the course than I did, and may have saved a little time if I didn't stop to help my brother-in-law Scott try to find his wedding ring, which he lost on the giant slip-and-slide just before the one mile mark. Everyone has been very encouraging in the fact that I gave it a try and didn't give up, regardless of what my time was.

Despite the Big Dawg Dare being the most physically challenging thing that I have done in my 33 years, I never once thought of quitting. Not when I slipped going into the water at the drainage pipe and landed face first (Mary has a dynamite picture of both my splashdown and my misery afterwards). Not when it took me four times to get over the hay bale because I have the vertical leap of a tree stump. And not when I had to bear crawl through the muck, not once, not twice, but four times at different points on the course, the last of which came at the finish line and left me looking like something that crawled out of a swamp in a bad science fiction movie.

Whenever things got tough, I remembered what Brian Hollo told me when I sat down with him for an interview about the inaugural event, that all of the obstacles would be challenging, but safe and doable. That's a pretty good description. Besides the fiasco with the hay bale, nothing really seemed impossible. A couple of times I was worried about losing a shoe in the mud or falling down a hill, but overall I figured that as long as I took my time, I'd make it okay.

Like most of the people there, I benefitted from having a pretty awesome cheering section throughout the course. My beautiful wife Mary was there to not only document the race for The Journal-News, but also to spur me on when I needed it, although I think she enjoyed my many miscues as much as my successes. My parents were also there - my mom to help watch my daughter Grace while Mary took pictures and my dad, because I think he assumed that I was going to die and he didn't want to miss it.

One of the biggest helps though were the random acts of encouragement that happened throughout the race, which came from volunteers, other racers and those who simply came to cheer on the participants. Almost every person I came across on the course was upbeat and positive, even if I looked like evidence of the zombie apocalypse.

To me, that was the best thing about the race. I saw very few somber faces cross the finish line. Determined, yes, but not somber. Regardless of whether you were running for the big bucks, like Litchfield grad Caleb Thompson, who finished in the top three for the third consecutive year, or just out for a casual 5K jaunt through the mud like myself, each participant left the course with a feeling of accomplishment, which was pretty cool.

So cool, I think I'll do it again. My biggest mistake from when I ran my first 5K in 2011 was that I didn't have another goal that would keep me running. I'm not going to make that same mistake twice and I've already verbally committed to doing another race, this one benefitting autism awareness with my sister Mikaela, who also did the Big Dawg Dare with me on Saturday, but in a much faster time.
I figure if I don't fall off the wagon this time and can do a few races with Miki, then I should be able to shave a few minutes off this year's Big Dawg Dare time, providing that her husband doesn't lose his ring again.

But even if I don't, I'll still have the satisfaction of knowing that I accomplished something that a lot of people aren't even willing to try. Like I said early, I'm proud to call myself crazy in that regard, but even prouder to be a "Big Dawg."

One of my finer moments from Saturday's Big Dawg Dare.

Ready Or Not - Most Likely Not

It has been approximately two weeks since my last update and I'm here to tell you that I'm in the best shape of my life and I am ready for the Big Dawg Dare, which is about 10 hours away.

Of course that's a huge lie. I fell off the proverbial workout wagon around the same time my blog posts stopped. At first the reason for the slow down was due to my knee, which politely asked me to stop running by sending sharp pains to my brain any time I moved it. Once the pain was gone, we went on  vacation, which is not a great excuse, but it's the one I am using.

I'm also blaming vacation for my horrendous eating habits. If God didn't want people to be fat, he wouldn't have created Pappy's Smokehouse and Donut Stop, which are two of my new favorite places.

On the bright side, I know I can do this tomorrow. They may have to time me with a sundial but I can do it. The key is just going to be to keep moving and don't let myself get too down. Even if I walk the entire race, that's still an accomplishment just to finish. But for the record, I won't walk the whole thing and plan to push myself to do my best. 

Another positive note is that I've decided to not make the same mistake I did after my first 5k. I thought I would be able to take some time off then restart running, even if I didn't have another 5k in mind. The break came, but the restart never did. To prevent history from repeating itself, I've already picked out my next race, which will be a 5k for autism awareness with my sister Mikaela, who is also doing the Big Dawg Dare with me as well.

I take a small amount of credit in getting Mikaela hooked on running (the first 5k she did was the one I did as well), but she's a big reason why I am trying to get back in shape through running. Her commitment to a healthier lifestyle and her improvement in the races she has done since the first one is inspiring and had brought us closer together.

That's one of the reasons I'm looking forward to the race tomorrow. I know that whether it takes me 40 minutes or four hours, it's going to be a lot of fun and something my family and I will always remember. See you at the finish line!

Days 'til the Dare: 1

Yes Wii Can

I had every intention of running today, but it just didn't work out. Grace had physical therapy this morning so I delayed my run until after work. Usually this would be a terrible idea due to the sweltering July heat, but today's weather cooperated and I head out to Beckemeyer around 5:30.

I started out just walking, partly because I was talking to Mary on the phone, but also because my knees felt like an 88 year old man. And by that, I mean they feel the same way an 88 year old man's knees might feel. I don't go around feeling 88 year old men. Just wanted to make that clear.

After three laps, I felt like I should do some running, so I made my way out to the goals for some off asphalt work. I ran the first three rounds straight through, going down and back and down again before walking back to my original starting spot. My knees hurt a little, but I figured I was good to go.

Wrong. I tried again and my left knee revolted. Nothing popped, nothing snapped, nothing shot out of my skin like a catapult full of cartilage. It just hurt. Kind of a lot. So I quit while I was ahead, or at least before I got behind.

Instead, Mary and I decided to do some cross  training  with a Wii Sports tournament after Grace went to bed. If you haven't caught on yet, anything but sitting on the couch, I now consider cross training.

We played a couple games of tennis bowling and the fitness test (26 mother truckers!), all of which I destroyed Mary in. While I didn't get a whole lot of excercise from it, unlike Mary, who plays tennis like she's actually in the court, running the living room like her glory days as HHS  tennis MVP in 1998, I did have a lot of fun. Except when Mary clubbed me with her controller during a particularly spirited rally. That kinda hurt.

Regardless of whether this helps me at the Big Dawg Dare (it won't), I had a blast and I'll be ready to train again after somebody takes the hot knife out of my leg. 

Days til the Dare: 16

Selfie after our epic Wii Sports tournament, which I won with ease.

Countdown To Collapse

Inspiration can come in many different forms. On Tuesday, it came in the form of one of three text messages I received before I woke up at 7 a.m.

"Just finished my workout for America. Suggest you do the same."

That was from Travis, one of my best friends who helped get me hooked on soccer. He also sent me a text that encouraged me to "get the (expletive deleted) up it's game day!!!!!", one of two texts pertaining to America's game with Belgium today (the other came from my brother-in-law who informed me he was taking off work at 9... for a game that started at 2 p.m. his time).

But I digress. I had already decided I was going to run today, despite some minor knee pain and the unquenchable desire to roll over and go back to sleep, but with Travis' 'Merica rallying cry, I threw on my American Outlaws bandana and found the "USA, USA, USA" playlist on Spotify.

This provided the second surge of inspiration. The playlist contained a nice mix of arena rock and hip hop, all up tempo and solid to run to. I decided to run the straightaways for three laps at Beckemeyer, then do some running in the grass between the two soccer goals.

Although my knees and lungs rebelled against this idea, I managed to run both straightaways on all three laps, with the help of Europe's Final Countdown on the final lap. While I found it odd that a band named after a decidedly non-American continent was on a playlist with not one but three USAs in its name, Final Countdown is my go to song in big game situations. I even catch myself humming it when I'm covering postseason play for the paper.

After the countdown hit zero, I hit the grass, which was apparently the cue for the playlist to switch to hip hop. I'm not a huge rap fan, but for running, you can do worse than Ludacris and Bonecrusher. Near the end of my workout, I was beginning to wear down. Then Eminem's Til I Collapse came on and struck a chord with me. I'm hit and miss with Marshall Mathers, don't like his goofy stuff, love his more serious work. 

While the song is about the rap game, a lot of the lyrics translate well to running, particularly Nate Dogg's work in the chorus. 

"Till the roof comes off, till the lights go out; Till my legs give out, can’t shut my mouth. Till the smoke clears out - am I high? Perhaps. I'ma rip this sh*t till my bone collapse."

The only thing I smoke is pork tenderloin, but the other than that, the lyrics were pretty inspiring. I managed to do 20 minutes of running on grass, including something that almost resembled a sprint at one point.

Ultimately a text message or a song isn't going to make or break my performance at the Big Dawg Dare, but it's kind of nice to know that there is something out there that can get me going, even when I'd rather be in bed.

Days til the Dare: 18

My workout for America.